


This is fine...

by The_noodlearms



Category: Detroit: Become Human (Video Game) RPF
Genre: Connor & Upgraded Connor | RK900 Friendship, Connors a little shit, Gavin Reed Not Being an Asshole, Good Parent Hank Anderson, Hank Anderson & Connor Friendship, Multi, Upgraded Connor | RK900 Has a Different Name
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-07-08
Updated: 2020-07-09
Packaged: 2021-03-04 23:42:31
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 5
Words: 3,589
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25154896
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/The_noodlearms/pseuds/The_noodlearms
Summary: Human/Gamer AuWhere connor and the jericrew are gamers. Hank's a tired dad, Conan is about to lose it, Gavin is tired of connor's shit (but loves him anyways),and Jericrew is back!
Relationships: Connor & Jericho Members (Detroit: Become Human), Connor & Upgraded Connor | RK900, Connor/Gavin Reed, Hank Anderson & Connor, Hank Anderson/Jeffrey Fowler, Markus/Simon (Detroit: Become Human), Tina Chen/North
Comments: 4
Kudos: 8





	1. First off:

**Author's Note:**

> This is inspire by https://youtu.be/IT57evSVriU

Preview:

"I swear to whatever god you believe in connor, I will stab you if you try me."  
-moment of silence-  
"ConNor nO!!"  
"CoNnOr yEs!!"  
\-----------------------------------------------------  
"North this is serious!"  
"Why the hell is he drowning?! He's not even in the water!"  
"We don't question the water god."  
-drowning sounds-  
"He's dead now."  
"We might have to question the water god a little bit."  
\-------------------------------------------------------  
"Connor get down here!"  
"Gavin we both know I have to do this!"  
"No, you don't have to do this"  
"But I must try"  
"Jumping off the counter is not going to prove that you have fall damage"  
"...You don't know that"  
\---------------  
Basically little shits playing games and are yelling demons. Stay tuned for the full story!


	2. Meet him!

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The meeting of not-an-asshole gavin!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A little backstory never hurt anyone. Also I could professionally write this but this is a crackfic so enjoy!

June 25, 4:35pm

Alright first thing first before we start. Connor anderson knew three things the first time he walked into the gym that afternoon:  
1.He was gay as hell  
2\. He was fucked  
3.No matter what height the man is,they will always be hot

He walks in through the glass doors hoping that today he could actually get a workout in before he agreed to game with his friends back at home. He would always nag onto his father about eating healthy cause good ra9 if he turns his back on him, the greasy food in the fridge would be gone in seconds. He asked what happened to his McDonald's burger that he bought for himself (he deserves nice things), hank just responded with a, "I was inspecting it for poison."  
"So you ate the whole burger?" Connor asked with a raised brow, resting his hand on his hip. "I forgot to tell you it wasn't poisonous" Hank then said waking away. Connor was not satisfied that his good cholesterol filled burger was gone in the hands of his father. To this day, hank was not forgiven. 

Connor walked in through the door and the first thing he saw was abs. Abs attached to a heavenly attracted man lifting weights bigger than him and on first thought, connor was lovestruck. The man has stood up to wipe off his forehead, and connor was having a gay panic. The man had looked up, adorable brown meets steel cold green-gray, connor looked away blushing heavily.

The man smirked looking over connor with intents we can't speak of, he lifted himself from the bench press waking over to connor. Connor was startled to see the man up close to him when he looked back, he saw the stubble on his jaw and a fair scar across his nose. That made him seem more attractive for some reason. "You like what ya see?" The handsome asked him when connor found himself staring for too long. "Maybe" connr said as nonchalantly as he could. If only he wasn't blushing, he'll be seem as chill. The man noticing connor's flustered state said, "I haven't quite catched your name cutie", "That's because I didn't throw it" connor retorted instantly. The man chucked, "The names gavin. Gavin reed" the man-gavin said.

"Nice to meet you gavin, the name's connor but you can call me whatever you want gavi" connor winked out as gavin blushed lightly at the nickname. "How about I call you my date for tonight, maybe a movie perhaps?" Gavin asked smiling. Connor didn't trust his dirty traitor of a mouth so he just nodded quickly. Gavin took that as a sign to pull out his phone, and look up at connor cause he was a tree with legs of sexy. Connor told him his phone number to which gavin out in and puts his phone into his gym shorts. "See you tonight con-con" gavin said walking out the doors grinning. Connor didn't move...

June 25, 6:38pm

Hank was casually laying in his couch dozing off. Sumo resting near his feet snoring lightly. That is until his son kicked open the door, rolled in on a skateboard, holding a boom box sweating while rick rollings, "Never gonna give you up" plays loudly. "Dad you won't you won't believe what happened holy shit-" he said casually vibrating. 

Gavin hurriedly ran home scaring his neighbors seeing his wide smile and giggling. He opened up his door, locked it closed, jumped into his couch and contacted tina immediately.

"Bitch you won't believe what happens today!" He says excitedly into the phone petting his cat sophie. "Let me guess, you got your gay ass up for once and found a man?" Tina responded back in a teasing tone, "Bitch you mad cause you lesbian", "Bitch you just lesbian but with men, you man lesbian" tina said back, gavin could hear the grin through the phone. Gavin then went on his whole rant about the sexy legs he met and tina was laughing the whole time. That's how connor knew he was fucked up.


	3. Minecraft

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Minecraft: 50 shades of shade and crack

mrkus200-Markus  
ILOVEDOGS-Connor  
Northstar- North  
Simonsays- Simon  
Galileopj500-Josh  
\-------------------------------------------------  
Connor yells out in horror as North brutally kills his sheep. North uses her pic axe to chop up the sheep for meat cackling.

ILOVEDOGS: Stop killing my babies!!

Northstar: Make me S I M P

The whole chat gasps as they heard the forbidden 's' come from North's mic. The chat goes silent and North rethinks her life choices.

ILOVEDOGS: D-Did you just call me...a simp?

North's character slowly backs up as connor slowly turned towards her arrow and bow ready. North sweats nervously.

Northstar: I swear to whatever god you believe in connor, I will stab you if you try me

Connor shoots at North killing her instantly. "Bitch" he says as she falls down.

Simonsays: CoNnor nO!!  
ILOVEDOGS: CoNnOr yEs!!

As Connor screams into the mic, his best friend Conan down stairs eye twitches as he continues reading his book as Connor rants about killing sheep and healing potions.

(An hour later)

mrkus200: Look honey, I just don't think this is working out. You're cheating on me with our chicken…

Simon looks at markus from across the bed holding his computer and gives a questioning look.

Simonsays: What do you mean? You made her

mrkus200- I don't remember making that

Simonsays: But you remember that night you was on a hoverboard, covered in a blanket sheet screaming down the street, "I'm Robo-jesus bitches!" As 5 roombas follows you

Galileopj500: It was time for Josh to leave, he has seen enough today

ILOVEDOGS: I'm so glad that I'm blindfolded right now

Northstar: Is that why you've been digging straight down?

ILOVEDOGS: No, it's because that way I'm blind enough to not see your bullshit

Josh laughs into the mic to which everyone winces but connor who deadass just stare at his pc screen.

ILOVEDOGS: josh that laugh was so fake, you make barbie jealous

Galileopj500: I came here to have a good time, but now I feel a t t a c k e d

Simonsays: No that's just north

Northstar: No I'm not! I'm not even the least bit violent!

Simonsays: When we let you go on that date with Tina you said you punched her face...in the name of love

Northstar:..Damn you got me there

mrkus200: Hey sluts, I found something

Galileopj500: What is it big bottom?

Markus appears back up on their screens holding a piece of coal.

mrkus200: It's my patience for you guys

Northstar: I hate you with every inch in my body

Galileopj500: That's not a lot hate you got there shortie

Simonsays: aw yeah you are short aren't you north?

mrkus200: c'mon quick, let's make fun of her of her height!

Markus, Simon and Josh casually makes fun of north, Simon laughs as Markus falls down one of the holes he made.

ILOVEDOGS: I need new friends…

Northstar: Sorry tree topper, you're stuck with us

Galileopj500: as if you have any other friends

mrkus200: That's so cold I literally shivered

Simonsays: he did randomly shiver and I'm not planning on sharing my covers

mrkus200: share the damn covers!

Simonsays: Go get your own bitch!

mrkus200: that is my own cause that's mY COVERS

ILOVEDOGS:...my dad hates us for a fact.

Northstar: I'm about to turn in for the night

mrkus200: I'm going to send you good dreams then

Simonsays: I don't think you can, she's so far away

mrkus200: Aw, now how am I suppose to send you good dreams?

ILOVEDOGS: you only send nightmares

Galileopj500: that was a burn I didn't know existed  
______________________  
After a few more minutes of chatting about their next play offs, connor turns off his pc and stretches.

"Are you done now?" Gavin asks behind him leaning on he doorway, towel.hanging loosely on his hips. Connor looks him up and down and takes a guess he just got out the shower. "Yeah I am, my throat is sore now. I'm gonna cuddle with you in a minute hon" connor says getting up and walking over to him. Gavin smiled softly, and pecks connor's lips. "Do you want some green tea? It'll make you feel better" gavin said before connor kisses him fully.

Connor tangles his hands into gavin hair, gavin let's out a low moan as connor tugs slightly. Gavin lifts up one of connor's thigh caressing it gently and leans away. "How about I make that throat a bit more sore?" Gavin asked smirking as connor blushed. It's been a few months and he still wasn't use to the it.

"I wouldn't mind that really but only if I get something to suck on later" connor leaned closer so their lips was brushing together. "Well then you're in for a-" he started before conan comes up the stairway. "Why is that everytime I walk up here and see you too, it looks like a starting of a porn show?" Conan mumbles to himself as he passes them and into the guest room they have.

To be honest, connor and gavin didn't really mind that at all.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Note to self: Don't give North sheep's, she will kill them.  
> The gang finally okae Minecraft, if any are confused by the arrange:
> 
> Conan is connor's best friend, they often get mistaken as twins but they aren't. Amanda adopted conan and hank adopted Connor.


	4. Sea of thieves

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The gang plays the sea of thieves with a little salt on the side.

Gavin hands were softly combing through connor's hair as he read his book. Connor, who's face was nuzzle into gavin's hip, sighs in content. It's rare when on days like this, where nothing goes wrong in the slightest. The world is peaceful, the air was a warm crisp as the sunlight warmth bask onto him. The bed sheets laying comfortingly on his body, him cuddled up to gavin and listening to him lowly hum made his heart stutter. Feeling a tugging feeling on his hair, connor looked up and was met with a fond look from his lover.

Gavin smiled softly and gestures for connor to rise. When connor lifts up looking at gavin with a confused look, he was met with a rough slightly chapped lips meeting his. He quickly fell in rythm moving his lips expertly onto gavin's. For a moment, the world seemed to revolve around them...until his fucking phone rang. Groaning, connor pulled away angrily answered the phone, not even caring to look at the name bar. "What do you want?" He asks with undertones of angry boi vibes. "First of all bitch, loose that attitude" simon's voice replied back in a sassy tone.

He met simon along with markus in first grade. They've stuck be each other side throughout their childhood years and high school. Markus then met north in middle school then he met josh through her. They like to pick at each other because what's friendship without a little bqq roast with some salt on the side? "Simon, you just called at the wrong time" connor says relaxing. "Yeah yeah. When you get done being screwed and all, me and the gang are planning on gaming later. You in, right?" Simon asks and connor practically see him looking over his nails with a deadpan look.

"I could be a top y'know" connor says with confidence, puffing our his chest as gavin gives him a amused look. "Connor sweetie listen. With the way dress, act, and look, you're more likely a salty bottom that hadn't gotten the D in a while" simon says as if he's trying to convince a child of something. "Hey hey lover boy, this bottom could kick your ass any day. I'm playing " connor says with a grin. They make fun of each other for a while before hanging up. "Let me guess, I have to deal with you screaming again?" Gavin asks with a smile, connor nods to gavin's dismay. He quickly pecks connor's cheek, and ran out the room shouting, "I ain't going dead again!"  
"Again??!"

5:30pm

mrkus200: North this is serious!

Northstar: Why the hell is he drowning?! He's not even in the water! 

North wheezed over her keyboard, tears in her eyes as she looks at the screen. Connor's character has gotten drunk so he was stumbling off into god knows where. Josh was somehow floating in the water that wasn't appearing on her screen for some reason so it looked weird as fuck. Markus watches from ship and simon tries to convince connor to shoot him out of cannon.

Simonsays: We don't question the water god

Josh proceeds to make drowning noises loudly as he gets out the game cause he died. North was laughing so hard, tina from across the room thought she was about to have a stroke. 

ILOVEDOGS: he's dead now...

Simonsays: We might have to question the water god a little bit

Galileopj500: I'm the water guardian, guardian of the water

mrkus200: I thought you was a water god?

Galileppj500: I'm the wATER GUARDIAN, GUARDIAN OF THE WATER

\-----------  
Northstar: Who wants to join my crew?

Simonsays and Galileopj500: I do!

ILOVEDOGS: ok, going with markus. I'm about to steal you man bish

-Simon proceeds to hit his legs with his sword-

Simonsays: And you're about to loose those legs privileges

ILOVEDOGS: I can still roll up in yo DMS

Simonsays: How?? You got no legs!

ILOVEDOGS: just put skates on my hands and roll me down

Simonsays: I don't want this as an image in my head, someone say something different

Markus: I got a big dick

Simonsays: anything but that

Northstar: I got twice the size of your dick!

Simonsays: nO-

Galileopj500: That is true though

Simonsays: Okay no talking about the dicks wait- hOW DO YOU KNOW THIS???  
\----------------------  
mrkus200: -perfectly calm steering his ship- This is so much calming then dealing with those idiots everyday  
....  
ILOVEDOGS: mark-CAPTAIN!!!

mrkus200: -looks at connor- y-yeah?

ILOVEDOGS: LOOK!!!!

Mrkus200: -looks to his left seeing a giant ass ship coming towards them- oH FUCK! NO NO NO NO NO! NO! -quickly tries to turn the ship as the big ship crashes into theirs- DUDE WE HAVE SO SHIT! DUDE!

ILOVEDOGS: we're so screwed

North: lol, they are so dead

Josh: -from te brig- definitely

Mrkus200: HOLY FUCKIN SHIT!! -Looks as connor with fear- GO, CONNOR GET DOWN THERE!! CONNOR GO!

ILOVEDOGS: -Salutes, goes down the ship stairs and proceeds to yeet everything off the ship including the gold they had- 

mrkus200: Oh fucking shit! Start breakin-HOLY FUCK!!

ILOVEDOGS: THEY AIN'T TAKNG ME ALIVE! -runs up the stairs and throws self off the boat-

mrkus200: COnNor yOu LiTtLe-

ILOVEDOGS: -peace's out- I'm dead bitches

Simonsays: what did you do??

mrkus200: tHe LiTtLe sHiT kILled himself!!

ILOVEDOGS: now you'll never get me

Galileopj500: You do know that you respawn back right?

ILOVEDOGS: but I'm gonna be shopping myself broke..

mrkus200: Silence homo

...  
ILOVEDOGS: yOu hOmo too shithead!

mrkus200: but I'm not your kind of homo

ILOVEDOGS: what is my kind is my homo then?

mrkus200: bottom homo

Northstar/galileopj500: Oh shit-

ILOVEDOGS: I'll hAVE YOU KNOW, ACCORDING TO THE WIKI-

Simonsays: nOw ISTEN HERE YOU LITTLE SHIT-


	5. Who's your daddy?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> This is why we can't have nice things Connor..

mrkus200: God damn it dad let me drink the damn bleach!

Simonsays: No this is for daddy to use

Northstar: Please stop calling yourself daddy, you ain't no top!

Simonsays: I will slap you baby ass so far, Google won't be able to find you

Galileopj500/ ILOVEDOGS: oHHHHH

Northstar: I will drown you both in the bathtub, I won't hesitate bitches

Galileopj500: I'd like to see you try shortie, you couldn't even stop Chuckie from kicking your ass at Chuckie Cheeses

mrkus200: Why the hell were you-?

Galileopj500: BITCH GONNA THREATEN THE RAT AS IF IT'S NOT GONNA DO ANYTHING, IT BITCHED SLAPPED HER INTO A TABLE!!

Northstar: And this is why I don't like birthday parties for little kids or animatronics..

ILOVEDOGS:....  
ILOVEDOGS: We're FNAF after this...

Simonsays: Connor nO!

mrkus200: Connor yEs!

Simon looks over at Markus from across the room with an offended and shockers look, "CoNnOr YeS???" He asked neck sticking out towards him like an ostrich. "I want to hear you scream from the animatronics and not from me for once" he replied back with a casual smirk and wink turning back to find himself on a car grill.

ILOVEDOGS: Oh my god I heard that and I want to choke the ever living soul outta you

Galileopj: I mean you have the legs, you could possibly be his top since trees does have bug trunks

ILOVEDOGS: I'm coming after you next and excuse me I have these things called sexy legs and I'm not giving them up

Simonsays: Your legs are chopsticks Connor

...

Northstar: Amazing grace how...

Galileopj500: We are gathered here today to honor the death of our beloved friend, Simon

markus: He honestly looks like one of those vanilla people that's done with his bosses jokes and are not gonna humor him when he's mad or just his resting "I'm not gonna hit you, I'm just gonna hardly hug with my hand..around your neck" face

ILOVEDOGS: That's my mood everytime my dad eats something unhealthy

Hank peacefully orders his McDonald's happily waiting until his food, by heaven's light, floats towards him. Almost made him cry in front of the employee, key word "almost". He paid for his food before driving home, Connor would be over Gavin's house for the weekend so he had Sumo and his Roomba to keep him company and doesn't have to worry about eating something while feeling like he's getting heavily judged by the food critic. He slumped onto the couch giddily taking out his double Mac burger, he slowly lifts up the burger to his open mouth ready to savor the flavor.

"720 calories" A whispered voice says in his ears and Hank thought death finally saw what the hell he was doing and was going to tell Connor. Connor stares down at him radiating "your bitch ass is gonna die" energy and he glared. "Dad..." He started.

"Let me enjoy my damn burger!"  
"It has so many calories!"  
"Then let them have calories, I'mma still eat it anyway!"  
"You are not going to eat that!"  
"I'd like to see you try!"  
"I have legs!"

Conan opens the door locking it before looking over at the scene. Connor holding a butcher knife squatting neck outstretched while Hank is squatting also holding a burger above his head eyes widened showing a "try me bitch" face. Conan looked between them before looking in the kitchen to see Jeffrey sitting at the kitchen table drinking black coffee while watching them. "Hi sir, what's going on?" Conan asked with a tilted head going over to make popcorn. "Connor's being a health nut" Fowler only said continuing to watch the men argue.

Conan had made himself some popcorn sitting down at the table. "106 calories" Connor hissed at him pointing over his bowl of popcorn. "You keep my food out of it before I show you the meaning of friendship" Conan said glaring with a raised fist. "Peace was never an option" Connor only said until chaos erupted.

ILOVEDOGS: SeT mE oN fIrE!!

Northstar: Me too! I want to be like rotisserie!

mrkus200: No I'm going to be a good dad and make sure you all don't try to kill yourselves

ILOVEDOGS: You're the worse damn dad, won't even let your son set himself on fire -proceeds to crawl towards a candle knocking it down-

Northstar: -giggles evilly-

mrkus200: Hoe don't do it

ILOVEDOGS: -crawls over to the fire before running around on flames screaming shrilly and laughing- Dad let me burn myself!!

Galileopj500: Bro really?? Sick duuude

Northstar: -doed that same as Connor screaming running around setting the others on fire-

Markus panics seeing his innocent well except Connor, children burning in front of him trying to get the fire off. Simon and Josh screams in fake agony as they run around being burned alive. Soon enough the babies win the game some they've died and Markus just sits there.

mrkus200: You see Connor..This is why we can't have nice things...

🌈🌈🌈🌈🌈🌈🌈🌈🌈🌈🌈🌈🌈🌈🌈🌈🌈

(A/n: You've been blessed with the gay)

"Connor get down here!"  
"Gavin we both know I have to do this!"  
"No, you don't have to do this"  
"But I must try"  
"Jumping off the counter is not going to prove that you have fall damage"  
"...You don't know that"

Connor halfway ontop of the counter looking over at a disappointed Gavin who's just tired of his bullshit. "Just come slowly over to me and let's talk this out" Gavin says carefully approaching Connor. "No" Connor says firmly climbing fully on the counter standing up t-posing. Gavin sighs tiredly smirking, "If you're gonna try it then at least do a backflip" he says jokingly. Apparently Connor didn't get it, "Affirmative". He then proceeds to jump up starting to flip, " Wait don't actually do it you dumbass!!" Gavin screeches he's trying to catch him.

This is going to be a looooong night.


End file.
